Male Life Expectancy

I received a phone call from my wife while sitting at my laptop and working yesterday afternoon. We usually email each other through the day. It's a great way to keep in touch yet not disturb the other at work. But yesterday, her first email was very brief, "busy!" So I set to work and didn't email her again that morning. She called to ask what the hell. No emails no phone call nothing! Didn't I care! OK, point taken. So, today I emailed regularly and didn't get a response. Apparently she was busy. So when she got home I asked so what's with no replies on the emails. She snapped back, "Oh man-up and stop being so needy ya girl"! Which leads me to ask, do lesbians live as long as heterosexual women and do gay men outlive heterosexual men. I ask as I'm certain that men die before women, a very well documented fact, because the women they live with slowly kill them, but uncertain as to wether this universal homicide is intentional, a skill slowly developed over millennia and passed down through the maternal line, or unintentional through wearing away at the male in their lives through incessantly being themselves.

Following this line of questioning/reason, if the latter, less calculating course of action applies, then perhaps the lesbians, torturing each other, would have a life expectancy of about the same duration as the tortured male heterosexual counterpart. We would have to, of course, exclude those lesbian who act like men. So, given a control group of feminine tending lesbians, using either intentional or unintentional approaches apply, they should each kick the bucket at about the age as a heterosexual male. Likewise, two gay men, living sans females, I hypothesized, should reach an age equivalent to heterosexual women. Alas, my gay friends tell me the comparison won't work as, "We all act like a bunch of women. It's like ya got two women in the house"! Which leaves us with a detailed study of feminine lesbians. Unfortunately, they're rather difficult to find and refuse to let me watch.